Idols

Hi friends! It's been another month or so since we've shared, time to catch up!

Do y'all struggle with idols? Over here at this house, at least for me, the struggle has been real. The things that I have made into idols are not inherently bad things, but becoming fixated an letting those things consume my thoughts and dictate my happiness have turned some inherently good things sour. 

People close to me have probably heard me rave about these books: quirky "off the beaten path" things to do, see, eat or stay in fun towns across the country, grouped into weekend stays. Instead of continuing to buy each region, I went ahead and bought the whole US book after I found out we were going to Boston. I was so excited to travel and explore a new area again. 

Fast forward to a couple weeks later. My dream of our next fall in Boston was gone because of major delays in obtaining my Massachusetts nursing license and an extremely inefficient Board of Nursing in multiple states. Skimming the pages of this book now makes me very sad. I have made an idol out of traveling: what we've done, what we've seen, places we've been- I have put my self worth in it and it left me broken-hearted.

What was once a sincere desire to see different places and do different things (and it still is there somewhat) has become efforts to impress others and myself. The fact that our plans were deterred to Orlando only a 1.5 hours away seems less impressive than Boston to me. And it doesn't quite add to the variety of places we had hoped to see while I was pursuing travel nursing. 

Things have not turned out the way we have hoped this summer, and our level of disappointment reflects the hope we were putting in our finances. Austin has not had any work since April and multiple unplanned events (a trip to the ER for my kidney stones, apartment fees/woes, failed nursing licenses) have taken their toll and left us worrying about money.

At work I am convicted once again when I think of the time I spend worrying out what other people think (Am I a competent nurse? Am I doing a good job? Do people think I'm lazy?) While I should be motivated more to do a good job for the sake of my patients and their families, I have let being in an unfamiliar environment create anxiety. 

All summer our study at church has been concentrated in Colossians where we are learning what it means to live "the good life." So many teachings in these verses ring true for my issues: 

¹² Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. ¹³ Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. ¹⁴ And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

¹⁵ Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. ¹⁶ Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. ¹⁷ And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. - Colossians 3: 12-17

Be thankful. Work hard in the name of the Lord. Let peace rule. Here is scripture telling me how I should deal with these idols.

So our plans have changed, and we still don't know what the future holds. Please pray for Austin and I as we figure out where we want our careers to take us and what our goals are.

I am excited about Orlando because I will be working days for the first time in my nursing career. Yikes! I'm hoping I will feel better physically and be a more productive human being.  

My mom was able to come for a few days last week (yay!) And she helped us fix up the apartment a bit and we also got the chance to explore and do some things we haven't done in Gainesville yet. It was a fun and relaxing visit!

I have 2 more shifts at the hospital here in Gainesville, then a week off before we start in Orlando. We are busy planning and packing, making sure we can fit everything in the car and we aren't forgetting anything. While I finish out the work week, Austin will be cleaning and packing the apartment. We have one last small group with our church here in Gainesville on Tuesday, my last day of work on Wednesday night, and then an all day drive (while I sleep- thank you Austin!) to my good friend Claire's bachelorette party at the lake house.

So excited for Claire- and a weekend at the lake!

Almost there, folks.  

Forsyth park in Savannah, GA visiting Jonathan a few weeks ago

Out to eat on Tybee! 

A super fun (and frugile!) visit to Disney world with Andrew and Melissa. No parks, just pool hopping! 

I rocked at this game of mini golf. Little did I know that kidney stones would take me down later that afternoon 

My mom came to visit, and it was the best! Popsicles, pizza, cookies, farmers markets, antiquing, Blue Springs (cold!) and of course Gracie Lou came too!!